En eh Grades, oor umpires gait a fair puckly amoont o' stick fae eh players, bit thae kin dish it oot 'emsels, like.

Fur maist Grades cricketers, eh thocht o' haein' nootral umpires ivry wick is jist a dream. Jist noo, baith clubbies ir sipposed tae privide an umpire an' it's aye aften ane o' yer ain players, tho' ane o' yer auld muckers micht hae a shottie if ye aisk 'im, like.

Wiv gait, eh noo, fower nootral umpires an' tho' sim o' thim ir scunners, fae time tae time, maist o' is ir glaid ayre willin' tae dae it coz ay kin gait a fair amoont o' stick. Ayre nae sae bad is ithers micht say, an' it least ayre fair, fit is mair 'an kin be sid fur gadgies fae yer opponents.

The fower umpires aye seem tae dae jist Grade 1 games an' a eh cup finals bit it wid be guid tae see thim daeing eh odd game doon eh grades an' gie 'em a wee brack fae a' eh CRAP fae sim Grade 1 clubbies.

Thae Grades is fair creein' oot fur auld players tae tik up umpiring bit fur ower mony years noo, naebody seems awfy keen tae dae it. Withoot 'em eh Grades winna dee, like, bit wur bitter aff wi 'em.

Grades umpires as if noo

Joe Scott - a fine loon wi' a trigger finger.

Ken Hughes - cheery an' aye dishin' oot eh pandrops.

Ken Morrison - likes a wee natter an' aye fair.

Iain Sutherland - jist a wee loon aginst eh ithers, bit ayewiz gies ye a couthy fit like.