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Article
Scorebook (pronunciation: thing-tay-be-fidd-ild-a-boot-wee)

submitted 27th July 2006

The scorebook is vital to Grades cricket..

The scorebook is, arguably, the most vital element in any successful game of cricket. Many advocate that having two teams on the ground, umpires, a wicket, stumps or a ball, are at least as important, but without the humble scorebook, a full days Grades cricket would be a pointless endeavor (which it sometimes is).

Most Grades clubs will get through one scorebook a season, although there is always a handful of unused pages that will never feel the touch of pen, quill, pencil or (in Artisan's case) crayon (they're not allowed potentially dangerous objects). This is because starting the following season with a brand new scorebook is effectively wiping the slate clean and the new season can get under way amidst a haze of rekindled optimism.

Guidelines to filling in a scorebook (Grades only)

1. Misspell as many of the opposition's names as possible, using humorous alternatives.

2. Adjust batsmen's position in the line-up using one of the following methods:

  1. score one batsman's name out and squeeze the replacement in the same space.
  2. use directional arrows to indicate a batsman's new place in the batting order.
  3. amend the numbers column.

3. Confuse the no ball symbol (o) with the wide (+).

4. Under weather conditions, use expletives (if, the usual, damp & cold) or mock surprise (if sunny & warm).

5. In the wicket condition box, always write "Shite" (the latest editions of Grades scorebooks now come with this automatically filled in as the default).

6. Over-emphasize golden ducks.

7. Always make the extras entries difficult to read to cover the inevitable mistakes and to enable "creative accounting" (known as "Shambollockry") at the end of the innings/game*.
*
(Note: scorebook entries rarely add up correctly and Shambollockry is, generally, always required).

Scorebook example

Below is a typical Grades scorebook entry:

DATE 11/7/05 HOME SIDE Artos AWAY SIDE Dunecht COMPETITION G2
VENUE Duthie Pk 2 INNINGS OF Dunecht TOSS WON BY Artos ('boot time too) WICKET &WEATHER Shite & Shite
NO. BATSMAN HOW OUT BOWLER RUNS
1 S. Poppleton st. (stabbed) Dickie Forsyth 21
2 A. Poppleton bowled Golder 2
3 A.Srivarammysomething? ct. R. Munro (jammy) Golder 23
4 B. Poppleton ct. M. Munro Forsyth 6
5 S. Poppleton (Snr) lbw Golder 7
6 S. Poppleton (Jnr) run oot  by miles 0 (Quack)
7 S. Poppleton Jnr (Jnr) kneed in groin Dickie Forsyth 2
8 Guy with black shoes bowled Forsyth 0 (Quack)
9 S. Milne retired hurt (joined another club) 65
10 Another Poppleton not out 7
11 Bob ?? chinned Dickie & Golder Forsyth 8
OVERS BOWLED

44

TOTAL
WIDES 4 NO BALLS 1 BYES 4 LEG BYES 6 EXTRAS 15
RUNS 141
FINAL SCORE 156 all out

 

This page was last updated Tuesday, 13 March 2007